Approximately 1.3 million women and 835,000 men are physically assaulted by an intimate partner annually in the United States (1).
Unfortunately many people are unaware of the danger they face or even that they may be in an abusive situation. According to Colorado Law, domestic violence is "An act or threatened act of violence upon a person with whom the actor is or has been involved with in an intimate relationship." (2) (Emphasis added.)
Educating our community is an important part of our mission so here is a list of red flags that can serve as indicators of an abusive relationship.
An abuser might...
- abuse alcohol or other drugs
- have a history of trouble with the law and / or fights
- refuse to work or go to school
- abuse siblings or pets
- put down people and / or call names excessively
- always be angry at someone or something
- move too fast, too soon in a relationship
- try to isolate you from your friends and family
- nag or force sexual encounters
- cheat on you
- be physically rough (restraining, pushing, pulling)
- take your money (or other ways of taking advantage)
- accuse you of being flirtatious
- refuse to listen to your opinions
- ignore you or give you silent treatment
- blame all arguments and problems on you
- have exreme mood swings
- tell you to shut up, call you fat, stupid or dumb
If you are being abused you might...
- feel afraid to break up
- feel tied down
- feel afraid to make decisions
- tell yourself that if you just try harder it will be OK
- find yourself crying a lot, being depressed or unhappy
- find yourself worrying or obsessing about how to please your partner
- find the physical or emotional abuse slowly getting worse
Trust your instincts!
If you feel something is wrong, please get help now.
For more information on recognizing the signs or abuse see our Recognize Abuse page.
(1) Patricia Tjaden & Nancy Thoennes, U.S. Dep't of Just., NCJ 183781, Full Report of the Prevalence, Incidence, and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence Against Women: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey, at iv (2000), available at http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/pubs-sum/183781.htm
1. "Domestic violence" means an act or threatened act of violence upon a person with whom the actor is or has been involved in an intimate relationship. "Domestic violence" also includes any other crime against a person, or against property, including an animal, or any municipal ordinance violation against a person, or against property, including an animal, when used as a method of coercion, control, punishment, intimidation, or revenge directed against a person with whom the actor is or has been involved in an intimate relationship.
2. "Intimate relationship" means a relationship between spouses, former spouses, past or present unmarried couples, or persons who are both the parents of the same child regardless of whether the persons have been married or have lived together at any time.